Proclamation of Trumpnesty and Reconciliation

BY THE DECEASED SIXTEENTH PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA:

A PROCLAMATION.

WHEREAS, in and by custom and tradition, it is provided that former Presidents of a given political party shall be used for their moral authority in intraparty disputes; and

Whereas, an attempted hostile takeover now exists whereby the loyal Republican voters of several states have for a long time been subverted, and many persons have committed, and are now guilty of, treason against the longstanding values of the Republican Party; and

Whereas, with reference to said takeover, a convention shall be held in the City of Cleveland, Ohio, in late July, to confirm the selection of said persons; and

Whereas, the Democrats have selected a candidate whose severe misjudgment has jeopardized national security for the sake of her convenience; and

Whereas, Americans are being forced to choose between a petty authoritarian who incites racist and antisemitic sentiment for his own personal benefit, and an utterly unethical politician; and

Whereas, under current circumstances, the Republican nominee will ensure that the Democratic nominee become president, that the Democratic Party retake the United States Senate, and that the Democratic president nominate as few as one and as many as five new Supreme Court justices; and

Whereas, the delegates at Cleveland are fully sovereign in all matters related to the Republican Party and have the power to provide the American people with a more suitable option; and

Whereas, many well-meaning party officials and voters may have made a regrettable decision to support Trump before learning of his utter unsuitability and the potential for alternatives; and

Whereas, the damage ensued by attempting to override the plurality outcome of the 2016 caucuses and primaries is substantially less than the damage that the current presumptive nominee causes to the Republican Party and the United States each day that he remains in his position; and

Whereas, I derive more enjoyment from employing this rhetorical device to a degree far beyond what is appropriate:

Therefore–

I, ABRAHAM LINCOLN, President of the United States, do proclaim, declare, and make known to all persons who have, directly or by implication, supported Donald Trump, except as hereinafter excepted, that a full political pardon is hereby granted to them and each of them, with restoration of their previous position in the Republican Party, upon the condition that every such person shall vocally support the delegates at Cleveland asserting their authority to reject Trump and replace him with any other suitable person, and that all persons take and subscribe an oath, and thenceforward keep and maintain said oath inviolate; and which oath shall be registered for permanent preservation, and shall be of the tenor and effect following, to wit:–

“I,                  , do solemnly swear, in presence of Almighty God, that I will henceforth faithfully support, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States; and that I will, in like manner, work to defend her from know-nothing celebrities and petty authoritarians. So help me God.”

The persons excepted from the benefits of the foregoing provisions are Chris Christie, Joe Scarborough, Sean Hannity, and Newt Gingrich.

To avoid misunderstanding, this proclamation and offer of amnesty shall expire on the twenty-second day of July, A.D., two thousand and sixteen, and of the Independence of the United States of America the two hundred fortieth, or the minute that Trump accepts the nomination of the Republican Party as its presidential candidate, whichever comes first.

Given under my hand at the city of Washington the fifth day of July, A.D. two thousand and sixteen, and of the Independence of the United States of America the two hundred fortieth.

ABRAHAM LINCOLN.

Adapted from Lincoln's Proclamation of Amnesty and Reconstruction, 1863. For more on Lincoln, check out my podcast. Inspired by the following tweet:

I think we should start discussing an amnesty for all those who supported Trump up to this point. If they agree to help #DumpTrump now.

— Holden (@Holden114) June 30, 2016

"I would save the Union."

I was thinking about a letter Abraham Lincoln wrote back in 1862, in response to the often-mercurial newspaper publisher Horace Greeley. I'll quote it in full.

Executive Mansion,
Washington, August 22, 1862.
Hon. Horace Greeley: 

Dear Sir. 

I have just read yours of the 19th. addressed to myself through the New-York Tribune. If there be in it any statements, or assumptions of fact, which I may know to be erroneous, I do not, now and here, controvert them. If there be in it any inferences which I may believe to be falsely drawn, I do not now and here, argue against them. If there be perceptable in it an impatient and dictatorial tone, I waive it in deference to an old friend, whose heart I have always supposed to be right. 

As to the policy I "seem to be pursuing" as you say, I have not meant to leave any one in doubt. 

I would save the Union. I would save it the shortest way under the Constitution. The sooner the national authority can be restored; the nearer the Union will be "the Union as it was." If there be those who would not save the Union, unless they could at the same time save slavery, I do not agree with them. If there be those who would not save the Union unless they could at the same time destroy slavery, I do not agree with them. My paramount object in this struggle is to save the Union, and is not either to save or to destroy slavery. If I could save the Union without freeing any slave I would do it, and if I could save it by freeing all the slaves I would do it; and if I could save it by freeing some and leaving others alone I would also do that. What I do about slavery, and the colored race, I do because I believe it helps to save the Union; and what I forbear, I forbear because I do not believe it would help to save the Union. I shall do less whenever I shall believe what I am doing hurts the cause, and I shall do more whenever I shall believe doing more will help the cause. I shall try to correct errors when shown to be errors; and I shall adopt new views so fast as they shall appear to be true views.

I have here stated my purpose according to my view of official duty; and I intend no modification of my oft-expressed personal wish that all men every where could be free. 

Yours,
A. Lincoln.

I will rewrite this letter based on my current orientation to the GOP race, and how I would like other Republicans to think about the race.

I would stop Trump. I would stop Trump the shortest way in the Republican nominating process. The sooner Trump can be stopped; the quicker the Republicans can set about repairing the damage he has done. If there be those who would not stop Trump, unless they could at the same time elevate Cruz, I do not agree with them. If there be those who would not stop Trump unless they could at the same time elevate Rubio, I do not agree with them. My paramount object in this struggle is to stop Trump, and is not either to promote Rubio or Cruz. If I could stop Trump with Jeb Bush as the nominee I would do it; if I could stop Trump with John Kasich as the nominee I would do it; and if I could stop Trump with Mitt Romney as the nominee, I would do it. What I do in this election, I do because I believe it helps to stop Trump, and what I forbear, I forbear because I believe it assists Trump. I shall do less whenever I shall believe what I am doing hurts the cause, and I shall do more whenever I shall believe doing more will help the cause. I shall try to correct errors when shown to be errors; and I shall adopt new views so fast as they shall appear to be true views.

Because this is my broader orientation to the race, I rank the candidates based on the likelihood that they beat Trump in a head-to-head contest. I see Rubio as most likely, followed by Kasich, followed by Cruz, followed by Jeb.

The main reason why I am hesitant to go for Cruz, even though he is best positioned currently, is that the antics of Chuck Grassley, Rudy Giuliani, and Orrin Hatch offering succor to Trump in the run-up to Iowa scared me. I don't like being scared into a given decision, but again, my top priority is to stop Trump, not to prove a point about brinkmanship. If I believed strongly that Cruz would beat Trump in a head-to-head, I would have already moved to Cruz. But I simply do not have enough confidence in Cruz to go that route.

Likewise, I have difficulty seeing Jeb Bush beat Trump in a head-to-head, considering the amount of ill will he has earned in this campaign, and how little return on investment he has gotten so far.

That leaves Kasich and Rubio. I vastly prefer Rubio as a candidate; I think he is a better messenger and better informed about the issues that the country faces today. But I would happily vote for any of the four alternatives--or anyone else not running that decided to run--if I believed that they were the best way to stop Trump.

Catching Up

I've had a few pieces run over at Ordinary Times:

First was my experience with the local crow population. I was attacked by a neighborhood crow, and I felt like writing about it.

A couple of weeks ago I wrote about Rick Perry's remarkable speech on race. I've been bullish on Perry for a while, but that speech even surprised me, and has stuck with me since. It is the only thing in this campaign that really has.

Last night I wrote something on Planned Parenthood and what I see as troublesome incentives.

And last week, I finally took my Master's exam. That won't be linked, mercifully. Results pending.

Media Bias and Fox News

My most recent piece: some thoughts on Fox News, bias, and misinformation:

http://ordinary-gentlemen.com/blog/2015/05/22/misinformation-media-bias-and-worldviews

The Not-So Longshot

I figured that the Christie piece deserved a companion, this one on the "not-so longshot" candidate.

http://ordinary-gentlemen.com/blog/2015/05/08/the-not-so-longshot

In my estimation, Rick Perry is the sleeper of the Republican race. The top-tier remains Bush, Walker, and Rubio, in some order, but Perry is the most likely candidate not in the top tier to break in.

Chris Christie: The Longshot

I revisit the theme of Christie as longshot over at Ordinary Times this morning.

http://ordinary-gentlemen.com/blog/2015/04/18/chris-christie-the-longshot

Attaching Strings to Anti-Poverty Legislation

I wrote a piece attempting to justify "strings attached" in anti-poverty programs over at Ordinary Times. It doubles as a bit of a critique of academia, or at least on analytical overconfidence. Link below:

http://ordinary-gentlemen.com/blog/2015/04/13/a-partial-defense-of-strings-attached